pensieve.me

WOW Day #4 || Chemical romance

“The mysterious magnet is either there,
buried somewhere deep behind the sternum, or it is not.”
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

Vacationing and sightseeing are not the same thing. 

A good vacation has medicinal value balming soul and spirit with rest and relaxation; a fun sight-seeing trip broadens experience and brings to life the places otherwise relegated to a book's page or a World Market canvas.  A bad either one of those can breed frustration, flat wear you out or give you legitimate reason to sell your kids to the circus. 

Eight years ago we packed up our kids, loaded up the van, and made the nine-hour trek to Washington, DC.  Clearly, this was not a vacation. 

DC is an amazing city, and after visiting many times before we had children, we couldn't wait until they were old enough to go.  At the time they were 13, 11 and almost 9, the perfect age for a visit--old enough to log a thousand miles on foot without excess complaining and potentially able to remember what they had seen. 

Between three kids in a private, Christian school at the time and my husband earning our only income, money was tight.  We made the decision to share one hotel room among the five of us.  Lest you get the wrong idea, this was no fancy schmancy suite-hotel.  We had two queens (fulls??), a lop-sided roll-away and a single, small bathroom. 

The city's vibe may be all power and seduction, yet D.C. is a wonderful family destination.  Entry is free to most museums and there is nothing compared to standing in the very spot at the Lincoln Memorial where Dr. Martin Luther King delivered his "I have a dream" speech or swaying at the top of the Washington Monument.  I'm sure I felt it.

After four days of touring every monument and museum in the city we headed home, exhausted but happy.  As is often the case on road trips, I fell asleep not long after we were on the road.  My husband takes that bullet for me, driving the majority of the time.  What may be a control thing for him is sweet gift to me.

By the time I woke up, the kids were asleep, a perfect time for uninterrupted, adult conversation.  Though we had been together constantly during our trip, my husband I were missing each other.  Being jammed in a hotel sardine can doesn't make for many romantic moments.

What he said next is one of those things I've never forgotten, the kind of thing that fans flame in a quarter century-old marriage (though at the time, we had been married 18 years).

"I had a chemical reaction to you."

My cocked head and squinchy eyes asked him to explain, so he did.

"When I looked at you while you were sleeping, my body reacted to you.  I looked away, then looked at you again, and the same thing happened."

Quite possibly, no sweeter words the man has ever spoken.

All these years into a marriage, I know that feelings don't always reflect love; particularly ooey-gooey honeymoon, fairytale, cartoon-hearts-circling-your-head kinda love.

Yet, without a word, without a touch, the very sight of me stirred something within my husband that attested to his affections for me. 

If that isn't testimony to the power and the wonder of a woman, I don't know what is.

Q.  Can you think of an exchange in marriage or friendship that testifies
to the power and beauty of your relationship?

Thanks for following along with our #31Days exploration into the Wonder of a Woman.  Please click here for further explanation and a listing of all posts to date.

WOW Day 3 :: What's so special about you?? (hint: everything)

 

image by Steve Lupton, available at allposters.com

At the risk of stating the obvious, I want you to meditate on something today:

 

Out of all the people who've ever been born, you are the only you.  By some estimates this means you're 1 in 108 billion. One in one hundred and eight billion!

Don't gloss over this...let is sink in to the center of who you are.

You're created in the image of the Creator of the entire Universe!

You're the only one with your exact DNA.

Your thumprint is unique.

No one can see through your eyes, hear through your ears, taste as your tongue tastes, or feel what your skin feels exactly the same way you do.

No human being who has ever lived (or will) can absorb, process and respond to life and experience the way you do. 

By design you're also a sensual being, deriving pleasure from engaging and satisfying the senses.  Often considered only (or at least first) within the context of sexual pleasure, a woman's sensuality can be - should be - much more. 

We have this amazing gift of multiple senses and it's a disservice to our bodies, minds and spirits not to fully engage them, to operate in an awareness of the messages and beauty they convey.  It's cheating ourselves out of the abundance offered by God!

It's the difference between --

...walking on the beach or feeling sand's grit rise to your arch and squish between your toes

...putting on a sweater or wrapping yourself in a woolen embrace

...watching a sunrise or applauding its Creator and celebrating new mercies

...playing a song or listening spellbound to its story, shivvering from the meloncholy of a lonely violin

...asking your husband how was your day? or drawing him into a conversation about it.

Today, see, feel, hear, taste and smell on purpose.

Take in the world around you and allow yourself to engage and experience the people, places and things you typically take for granted.

Then, please come back and tell me what you've been missing.  I really want to know.

A 31-day exploration into the Wonder of a Woman: 
personal reflections, inspiring quotes, portraits of beauty...and more. 
For brevity, I'm now abbreviating Wonder of a Woman to WOW;
isn't that kinda wonderful itself?

Accepting with gratitude and appreciation
the #31Days writing challenge by the Nester
(over 1,000 writers are joining me!).

My category?  Too Awesome to Categorize :).

 

The birth of wonder (and why I pity men)

So God created mankind in his own image,
    in the image of God he created them;
    male and female he created them.
~ Genesis 1:27 (NIV)

I'm inclined to believe God is particularly fond of the female gender and you would be hard-pressed to convince me otherwise. 

Before I became a wife,

before my womb was cradle to new life and I was crowned in the glory of motherhood,

before I was someone's daughter or grandbaby or sister or friend,

before first breath escaped from my lungs or my eyes squinched to the starkness of light,

God made me wonderful.  And though I may not have known it, my soul was already well aware (Psalm 139:14).

God made you wonderful, too, and before you cast off that idea as too simplistic or trite or, well, Jesus-y, think on it. 

Human beings are created in the image of God, the Divine One from Whom all things are created.  To meditate on that and its implications will blow your mind, much like the concept of infinity or the Trinity or eternity. 

Settle your spirit.

Quiet the noise.

Free your imagination to consider what it means actually to believe we're God's image bearers in this world.

Mind blown.

I can't think on these things too long because it's like staring at the sun with naked eyes. 

It was after the birth of my daughter, our first child, that I began to observe God's favor toward women.

Her gender was determined at the moment of conception (as is the case for all of us), though in the heavenly realms she was always female. 

My body was designed to incubate life prior to delivery, and following her physical birth, my body continued to sustain her life.  My body!

I wanted to shake everyone around me and shout DO YOU SEE THIS MIRACLE?!  IS THIS NOT EVIDENCE OF THE EXISTENCE OF GOD?!! 

During each pregnancy ~

I watched in awe as my babies sommersaulted ripples across my swollen belly...

I thrilled to the jolt of their hiccups (though not as much when they used my bladder as a trampoline)...

I was astonished as my breasts filled, painfully so, for my babies' tiny, eager lips, and equally amazed as they drained me to satisfy their hunger, how even the thought of this could cause my milk to let down and leave my clothes sour and soaked and me running for cover.

For all they can do, for all they're created to accomplish, men will never know what I'm talking about.

And though not all women will eventually give birth, it is womankind who bears the distinction, the honor, of conceiving and carrying and bringing forth life.

It breaks my heart to know there are countries and cultures that don't cherish the sacredness of their women, who distain them, abuse them or relegate them to second class...or worse.

The esteem of women is seeded in Creation and she is the carrier of its redemption.

Let's begin to explore the wonder of a women through that lens.

 

A literary trifecta!!

Three books release today from authors I'm privileged to also call friend:

• Emily Freeman's A Million Little Ways
• Pete Wilson's Let Hope In
• Angie Smith's children's book Audrey Bunny

Though I received advance copies of all three, these will be books I'll purchase and pass along as gifts.  There are bunches of reasons to buy all of these--each book is special and important and carries a potentially life-altering message. 

I promise, that is no exaggeration.

 

The subtitle of A Million Little Ways perfectly summarizes the content--"uncover the art you were made to live."  She invites you to see yourself as not only God's workmanship, but a poem...living art.

This is Emily's third book and I noticed something by the forth chapter:  this is the book where Emily's writing voice grows up.  She speaks with remarkable authority that took me by (pleasant) surprise.  

Her words here encouraged me in places I didn't even realize I needed to be encouraged.  In a very real sense this book gave me permission to lead out in areas I've been reluctant to pursue, and indirectly inspired my The Wonder of a Woman 31-Day series. 

Take 90 seconds to watch her book trailer and you'll be convinced A Million Little Ways is a must-read.

 

* * * *

One thing I appreciate about Pete Wilson's writing style is its accessibility; he doesn't talk over your head, he speaks straight to your heart.  In Let Hope In he explains our four choices:

1. To transform instead of transfer
2. To be okay with not being okay
3. To trust rather than please
4. To free people rather than hurt them

Once we begin to see that we are always making choices; and by making healthy, intentional choices, healing can begin and everything changes.  Grasping the grace that God extends, the true hope that he offers, will not only make a difference today but forever. 

Pete is doing something really cool with his book launch today; tonight at 7:30 EST (6:30 CST) he's hosting a live online event.  He'll be joined by special guests Natalie Grant, David Landrith, Angie Smith, Mandy Hale, Plumb and a couple other surprises.  If you're near a laptop, tune in to watch and hear from Pete himself (and then you'll be itching to buy the book, too). 

* * * *

And then there's Angie Smith's Audrey Bunny, a beautiful children's story magnificently illustrated by the ridiculously talented Breezy Brookshire.  Angie's tender words combined with Breezy's whimsical images produce nothing short of a magical, modern-day classic.  Full of symbolism from Angie's personal story of loss and love, Audrey Bunny is poignant reminder that "God loves you and created you just the way you are".  This is a perfect gift for an expectant mother, a gift for children who love to hear stories, and for anyone who wrestles their imperfections.  List price is only $14.99 but it's currently discounted to only $8.99 at Amazon (not sure how long that price will remain, so snag a few copies while you can!). 

 

-----

Amazon affiliate links included.

The Wonder of a Woman

I have a secret.

I have a secret I'm SO STINKIN' OVERTHETOP EXCITED ABOUT I CAN BARELY KEEP IT INSIDE!!

And since it is my secret, I can decide when to let the kittehs out of the bag, no? 

In just over a month from now...

my blog...

is going away!

After eight years of wearing the same dress - isn't that like eighty years online?! - I'm changing outfits.  PENSIEVE is going away.

Evidence that I'm ready for the change, there are no misty eyes, no second guesses, no misgivings at all.  I'm only eager, excited and expectant.

And whether you're reading me for the first time or the 2001st time I hope you'll join me at the new place. 

I'm not going to share specifics just yet, but I'll give you a series of hints during the next month while I'm participating at the Nester's 31 Days Writing Challenge (this would be a GREAT time to subscribe to my current blog, so you'll receive notice when the new one goes live.  My incredible designers, George and Ashley at Tekeme Studios, visually captured the exact sense I was hoping to communicate and I cannot wait to share it with you <ten thousand exclamation marks/>).

The new site will go live sometime between now and November 4th (earlier if they can make it happen). 

In the meantime, what will I be writing about for the next 31 Days? 

Women are complex creatures.  We defy simple explanation (though there's no loss of attempts to define us).  My goals over the next month are to:

• speak life and love into our collective, sometimes weary souls
• explore the wonder, beauty and incredulous aspects that make us decidedly female
• challenge you (and me) to discover new ways to accept ourselves just the way we are
• encourage those of us who sometimes feel like the world is passing us by, that we missed out on our one chance to DO something that matters, or that our best years are behind us.  Fooey on all that junk.

I do NOT plan to write daily for 31 days; instead, every time I DO write, it will have to do with women and how I see them as amazing, wondrous creatures.

(For those of you left hanging on a cliff, I'll pick up with my "If you can't be with the ones you love" series in November.  Sorry!!)

The guys might wanna sit this one out (or if they're very wise, they'll understand why they'd wanna stick close!).  For women approaching (or passing) those milestone "F" birthdays, you're gonna wanna hang tight.  For those facing "T" milestone birthdays, you might want to follow along because one day soon enough, you'll reach the F ones, too.  And for those who've celebrated the "S" birthdays?  Well, I might not have experience but I sure hope this encourages you! 

And if you're slow to recognize what F and T birthdays are, well, just consider milestone years and you'll figure it out soon enough.  ~ wink ~

So, over the next month, I'll be sharing personal reflections on womanhood, aging and insights on turning 50; inspiring quotes by and about women; mini-portraits on some amazing women; and if things work out, a guest post or two.

Please plan to follow along; I'd love for us to do this together.

Q1.  Are you a blogger planning on taking part in 31 Days of ____?  DO share your topic for the month in comments.

Q2.  I'm curious if there's anything you're hoping I'm writing about.  Though I have a general idea of how I'm planning to proceed, there's room for you to ask questions or share your thoughts and ideas.  I'm open to your suggestions--this could be a fun and challenging interactive exploration.

 

I'll update this page so you can easily locate each post!!  (And somewhere along the way, I've begun using WOW to abbreviate the Wonder of a Woman.  Isn't that kind of awesome and perfect?)

• Introduction to The Wonder of a Woman
• The birth of wonder (and why I pity men)
• What's so special about you?
• Chemical Romance
• Around/About: The WOW "They're too Awesome to Categorize" Edition
• The Beauty of a Woman
• Enduring Friendship
• Inexplicable Connection
• An Epiphany (& things to come) Don't miss this one!!
• State of the Blog Re-design (& Definition of Wonder)
• (Im)perfect Body
• Around/About: The WOW "Inspiration/Writing" Edition
• A Woman's Super(natural) Power  (one of my favorites!!)
• A Guest Post from Precept Author and Conference Leader B.J. Lawson
• Sometimes We Forget We're More the Same Than Different
• Fire Starters

 

 Thank you for checking in!! 

An encouragement to daughters

And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him.
A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.
~ Ecclesiastes 4:12

 

For all but the first four months of high school, I had a boyfriend.

It was a tumultuous thing, this teenage romance, full of all the drama and conflict of an 80s John Hughes film. Break-ups. Make-ups. Cheatin’ hearts. Both of us.

I remember practice-writing my married name a thousand times – my first and his last – and I even set our wedding date for September 17, 1985 (I liked that date for no particular reason at all). As fate and young love would have it, we went our separate ways by college and eventually lost touch altogether.

Years later, when I heard “our song” begin to play at our ten-year class reunion – The Commodores’ Three Times a Lady – I asked my husband of then eight years if he minded if I asked my old beau to dance. He was fine with it, but my friend declined–his wife didn’t approve.

It was the last time I saw him.

* * * * * ** *

The way I see it there are two ways to live with regret:

1)  To be bound by it, anchored to your past, where your history informs your present and you’re too paralyzed to move forward (negative and unproductive).

2)  When you recognize if you were given the chance to go back in time and make different decisions, understanding then what you know now, you likely would. It doesn’t mean you’re continuously beating yourself up over it; you simply have the benefit of knowing the consequences of your past decisions and realizing there was a better choice you could have made.

Unless you happen to end up marrying your high school sweetheart, maintaining a close friendship with him after marriage probably isn’t the best idea. Conversely, your relationships with your girlfriends are something you can hold onto always and forever. 

This, among several reasons, is why we encouraged our children to pursue friendship with members of the opposite sex when they reached high school. While we didn’t forbid dating, we discouraged it by encouraging group outtings and spending time with their friends.

* * * * *

I'm over at incourage today, talking about dating, not dating, how regret can be
negative or constructive, and how your choices serve you. 
Please click to continue reading and to offer your perspective.

Best Chattanooga Restaurants for Dinner (+ a $50 giveaway!)

I've saved my favorite Chattanooga restaurants for last; while most of them could be lunch destinations as well, I prefer these for dinner fare.  I'll share a bit about why they're included and pictures if I have them. 

Boat House Rotisserie & Raw Bar

Riverside, 1459 Riverside Drive, Chattanooga, TN 37406 || 423-622-0122

Our view...

Why I love it:  Back porch seating overlooking the Tennessee River.  It's worth it to wait or arrive early (or late) in order to grab a spot; you're doubly lucky if it's at sunset.   The Boat House is located along the Tennessee Riverpark, a 10-mile stretch of trails starting at the Chickamauga Dam and ending in Downtown Chattanooga.  We park our car near the dam and ride bikes to the Boat House; then, stop for a few eats and drinks to rest and reload for the rest of our ride.   

 

Something special:  If you arrive between 2-6, you'll receive Happy Hour prices on drinks AND appetizers; you'll be able to sample a lot for a little money.  Their fried okra is spectacular--whole pods sliced lengthwise, then lightly battered and fried to perfection (my friend Stephanie swears by their woodgrilled okra but I'm holding tight).  Funny, I've only tasted a few menu items because these things are what keep me coming back. Salads are very good, the Voodoo Chicken is a nice change-up on chicken, and their fries, cooked in olive oil, are impossible to resist.

One more thing:  This is one of the three restaurants owned by Lawton & Karen Haygood that make my list.  Three different concepts, three fantastic eateries.

 Facebook page || 

 

Public House

Southside,  1110 Market St. Chattanooga 37402 || 423.266.3366

Why I love it:  The story behind the restaurant: "...an extension of a community..." (one reason I love homegrown spots).  They offer high quality & local-when-possible ingredients, attentive service, and little details that make a difference (i.e., black napkins if you're wearing dark clothes but white cloth if not). They offer two sizes of sides, a wide variety of selection and complimentary Niedlov's yeast rolls (but only by request).

Something special:  The decor will grab your attention the minute you walk in the door.  For some reason the white leather (pleather? vinyl??) made me think "Frank Sinatra"...but I don't know why.  It feels simultaneously retro and current.  

If you'd like an afternoon cocktail or have to wait for a table, be sure to check out The Social, a small gathering spot/watering hole just beyond the restaurant.  It was there one afternoon the bartender gave us a lesson in all things Chartreuse, its origin as a French liqueur made by Carthusian Monks, which in turn, lends itself to the yellow/green shade by the same name.

One more thing:  It's been too long since I've eaten at the Public House, in large part because it's 30 minutes+ from our house; the fried chicken is the only thing I can remember to recommend; but I couldn't let that stop me from putting it on my list--it really is a special place.   Oh, and I can't think of anyone else who has a better, more engaged, local social media presence!

Facebook || Twitter

 

Urban Stack

Southside, 12 West 13th Street Chattanooga, TN 37402 || 423.475.5350

Why I love it:   Their venue, the Southern Railway Baggage Building (circa 1867), and yes, their burgers.  Plus, I applaud them for buying local when possible.   My go-to burger simple--The Big Cheese--but it becomes spectacular with their housemade pimento cheese, melty and drippy.  Say yes to the Gouda Creamed Corn and a dessert shake using Clumpies Ice Cream.

Something special:  They've built "one of the most environmentally friendly businesses in one of the oldest buildings in the city."   (LEED Certified.)  Cool beans.  

Urban Stack is one of several restaurants that make my list by local restauranteurs Taylor and Mike Monen--I mentioned Milk & Honey on my breakfast list and you'll see another below.

One more thing:   This is a burger and bourbon bar, and from what I understand they have some mighty fine whiskeys--I'm wildly curious if I could tell the difference between a 2-ounce pour of Johnnie Walker Blue ($67, most expensive) and Old Crow ($4.50, cheapest).  The bourbon menu is fun to read and it's educational: you'll learn there's a way to order it: neat, on the rock or stacked.

Unless you arrive during off hours, you're going to have to wait.  

Facebook || Twitter

 

Taco Mamacita

Northshore, 109 North Market Street, Chattanooga, TN 37405 || 423.648.6262

Why I love it:  It's not Tex-Mex, it's Fresh-Mex.  This is the third restaurant making my lists from the talented team of Mike and Taylor Monen.  I love Taco Mamacita's branding--colorful, fun, memorable and consistent with their fare.  You really can taste the fresh, and Taco Mamacita is not - I repeat not- a typical Mexican restaurant.

Something special:   Mexican Street Corn, shaved (off the cob) and the Salsa Sampler (mango jalepeno, sweet and spicy).  My favorite taco is the General Homeboy and their Peruvian Chicken is tender and yummy.  Like margaritas?  Try the Elvez.

One more thing:  This is the only Monen-owned restaurant with locations elsewhere - Nashville and Sullivan's Island - but I'm thinking that's only a matter of time.  The Monens develop a concept well, set a standard of excellence, and the rest is up to the customers.  If you're at any of their restaurants during peak hours (Taca Mamacita, Urban Stack, Milk & Honey and I'm guessing Community Pie, too, a newish pizza venture), you're going to have to wait.  It's worth it.

Facebook || Twitter

 

Two chains I have to mention--
1) because they're in the Gunbarrel Road/Hamilton Place Mall area
(so much of what I mention is downtown); and
2) because they're closer to where we live, they're places we frequent.

J. Alexanders

2215 Hamilton Place Blvd, Chattanooga, TN 37421 || 423.855.5559

Why I love it:  Consistent, excellent quality, large portions (though smaller in recent years) and exceptional service.  I'm partial to their salmon or marinated rib-eyes, and their loaded baked potato is the loadiest of them all.  

Something special:  Servings are large and we typically share an entree and split a salad. There's no way you'll have room for dessert if you get an appetizer, so keep that in mind.  They've recently added guacamole to their menu and it's absolutely HOLY GUACAMOLE!  A mile high and chunky, expensive but soooo good.  

One more thing:   The Key Lime Pie WILL be the best you've ever put in your mouth--mounds of real, whipped cream and not too tart, not too sweet.  All of their desserts are delicious, worth the price and calories, large enough to share.   Also, they're one of the few local restaurants I've found that serve Mollydooker wines by the glass, a favorite when I can get it.

 Facebook || Twitter (No local social media presence--boo!)

 

Bonefish Grill

2115 Gunbarrel Rd, Chattanooga, TN 37421 || 423.892.3175

Why I love it:  Five dollar Bang Bang Shrimp on Wednesday nights!!  I get a side salad & their delicious bread and it's a wonderfully priced, consistently good meal.

Something special:  Servers knowledgeably recommend what preparation to go with the type fish you're considering.  Warm mango salsa, pan asian, lemon butter--it's hard for me to decide because they all sound good.  Also, their Pecan Parmesan-Crusted Trout was fantastic the last time I had it (but since I keep going back for the Bang Bang Shrimp $5 deal, it's been a long time since I've ordered anything else).

One more thing:  Don't turn your nose up if you aren't a fan of chain restaurants or think you can't get good seafood when you aren't near the coast.  There's a very good reason Bonefish is always crowded--it's fairly priced, the staff is well-trained and attentive, and the seafood is consistent and delicious.  (Consistency is important to me, can you tell? It's high praise when I mention it.)

In fact, I happened to find out in advance that Bonefish Grill was voted the Times Free Press Best of the Best for Seafood in Chattanooga this year!!  They'll be featured in the TFP 9/27 edition (along with the rest of the Best of the Best winners)!

In celebration, Bonefish is awarding a $50 gift card to one of my readers, details at the end of this post.

Facebook || Twitter (Facebook is local (yaeee!), Twitter is corporate)

 

Worthy mentions:

I like these spots a lot, and I'll tell ya why ~

Sugar's Ribs.  Yummy barbecue, fresh corn on the cob (a specialty, you'll see why), wood-grilled okra & perfect sweet tea.  Owned by the same couple as Boat House Rotisserie and Raw Bar (and Canyon Grill below), they do what they do VERY well.  Plus, there's entertainment for the children:  goats.  While you're waiting on your food, you can feed the goats!  (Yes, they're outside...!)

Tony's Pasta Shop & Trattoria.  A fabulous location in the Bluff View Arts District (downtown).  Tony's is a local institution, reasonably priced and good Italian.  It has fun outdoor and upstairs (backporch) seating, but you're going to have to wait if you arrive during peak hours; there are no reservations or call ahead seating.  

St. Johns Restaurant.  Arguably the nicest restaurant in Chattanooga; also, the most expensive (the reason I didn't include it in more detail).  You can expect excellent service in a beautiful setting, but if you eat upstairs, your food might cool a bit by the time it arrives from the downstairs kitchen.  There's also their sister restaurant right next door, the Meeting Place.  For some reason, we've never made it there, but it's reputed to be the same delicous food; just in a more casual setting.  Yep, it's on my list.

 

And if you ask me my absolute favorite?  I'll tell you........

Canyon Grill

The Haygood's third restaurant on my list (joining Boathouse and Sugar's).  It's a worthwhile drive from downtown Chattanooga, located in a modest building at the top of beautiful Lookout Mountain.  Don't judge this award-winning restaurant by its cover--the food is memorable, fresh and nothing short of spectacular.  They ice down all their meats and seafoods rather than refrigerate them.  My favorites:

• Slash & Burn Catfish ~ it's not just an entree, it's an experience.  Ugly to look at, beautiful to eat, and they keep track of how many they've sold (21,571 when I checked).  I cannot believe they've shared the recipe.
• Fried Squash ~ I cannot figure out how to duplicate its light coating, and it is by far the best I've ever tasted.
• Coconut Cake ~ OhMyLanta--THIS is Nectar of the Gods in cake form.  I don't even LIKE coconut, and every time I eat this the heavens illumine and angels sing.
• Other mentionables:  hickory smoked steaks and bread pudding (one of my friends wanted to buy the decadent sauce and drink it).  Canyon Grill is located in a dry county, but you can "bring your own" if you'd like.

 

BIG THANKS to Bonefish Grill for offering a $50 giftcard to one of my readers, in celebration of their Times Free Press win for Best of the Best - Seafood in Chattanooga!  (Giftcard is good at ANY Bonefish Grill.)

To enter this giveaway, simply Like this post using the FB button below and/or share this post within your social networks.   Comment the URL to your Facebook Status, Tweet, Pin or whatever you choose to do; you can also Like the Bonefish Grill Chattanooga and Corporate page and comment that you did for extra entries.  

You're welcome to enter more than once but be sure to leave a separate comment for each entry.  Deadline for entry is Friday, September 27th (midnight EST), the day the Times Free Press award winners are published.

 

The Best Chattanooga Lunch Spots

My Favorite Chattanooga Breakfast Venues

 

Why I should learn to act my age

I have a thing about tan lines.

I always have, and given the fact I'm writing this at mid-life, I suppose I always will.

My youth was a slather of baby oil and iodine or Hawaiin Tropic--mercy!  I can still smell glorious coconut just thinking about it!  Some friends swore by Afro Sheen, evidence we'd use just about anything.  On the half hour, crackley and full volume, transistor radios reminded us "Time to turn so you don't burn."

We didn't bake under summer's burner, we broiled. Rotisserie humans.

Dumb as chickens.

These days, while I've shelved the Hawaiian Tropic and always use an SPF of 15 or higher on my face, I still like sun on my shoulders.

Sans the tan lines.

I'm not sure why I loathe tan lines across my décolletage, but I do.  Maybe it's because you never know when you might need to wear your princess dress?  

Perhaps. 

But, it's not like I'm wearing strapless tops or sundresses every day--I don't own either!

My tan line issues go futher:  I like a tan stomach.  Which is definitely an issue when you're no longer sporting a bikini...

In public. 

That sentence should read, "Which is definitely an issue when you're no longer sporting a bikini in public."

Except if I'm being 100% truthful, it should say, "Which is definitely an issue when you're no longer sporting a bikini in public OR WHERE YOU DON'T KNOW ANYBODY AND DON'T CARE WHAT THEY THINK ANYWAY."

OhyesIdid...this summer during our summer beach vacation, I dug out my old two piece from when I was 15-20 pounds lighter and I wore that sucker in public.

It wasn't like I was strolling the beach giving women reason to feel better about themselves.  Mostly, I shimmied off my beach cover-up while laying prone on a beach chair - quite a spectacle in and of itself - and then melted into my lounger, believing if I couldn't see "you", you couldn't see me.

Perfectly logical, no?

My family is very forgiving, understanding this is just one of my Things.  Everyone has their Things, and No Tan Lines is one of mine. 

When I'm at my neighborhood pool,  however, it's a different story. 

There, I'm inclined to care what people think since I'll likely be facing them at the grocery store that afternoon. 

So I wear a tankini, right?  They cover a multitude of sins and hide - how shall we say it? - problem areas. 

Actually, that's not entirely true; only a Burqini does that.  But we've already established I like sun on my shoulders, not to mention I'm not Muslim.

So, what's all this got to do with why I should learn to act my age?

Well.

It was beautiful over the weekend and I decided to spend a bit of that time poolside, wringing out the last drop of summer before fall slips in later this week.

My Grand Plan was to lay out 45 minutes on my back, then flip for 45 minutes on my stomach.  If no tan lines is important to me, it stands to reason even front/back tanning matters, too.

So I do what I always do:  once flat on my back, I untied the strap behind my neck and carefully tucked them under my arms so my top wouldn't slip.  Then I folded the tank part over my bust so my stomach would get a little sun. 

It was only after 45 minutes, when I was about to flip over, that I noticed it.

As I was re-tying my neck strap and unfolding the tank to re-cover my stomach, I happened to notice I was wearing my bathing suit bottoms....

inside-out.

A warm flush totally unrelated to the sun swept over my entire body as I imagined every eyeball at the pool glued to the white lining that usually characterizes the crotch of a bathing suit bottom.

A flashing neon sign....

An oddly displaced scarlet letter....

I heard a thousand disapproving, rightly judgmental tongue clucks, imploring me to please wear a modest one piece appropriate for A Woman My Age.

Horrified and self conscious, I did what anyone in my position would do.

Flat on my back, I shimmied my cover-up back on, hid behind my sunglasses and slithered to the bathroom.  There, I promptly insided-out my bathing suit bottom, finding reason to thank God in this oddest of circumstance when I discovered the lining, in fact, was the color of my bathing suit.

Surely no one could see the seam if it was the same color, as if anyone would have noticed it otherwise! 

Relieved and wearing I don't care like a super hero mask, I strolled back to my chair, shimmied off my cover-up, laid on my stomach, cinched my top just so to get maximum back sun exposure...and started giggling. 

Only me...sigh. 

About that time I heard an inner, quiet whisper ask Robin, honey, is this a sign to give up your No Tan Line Thing and Start Acting Your Age?

The Quiet Whisperer had a legitimate point.  Either I didn't have the cognitive ability to process what a properly turned garment should look like, or my eyes are so presbyopic I couldn't see the tell-tale inner seam.

After thoughtful consideration I faced the question:   IS it time to forget about tan lines and start acting my age? 

*

*

*

Never.

Love mercy? Love Mercy!

There is no greater use of words than to speak on behalf of those who have no voice.

 

While I've failed to practice this to the degree I believe it in recent years, I'm convinced that any persuasion or influence I have is at its best when serving others. 

 

There's an opportunity to help an organization that is changing HISTORY for the lives of the young girls it rescues.  Mercy House Kenya, a small but critical ministry in Africa that takes in pregnant teenagers (rape victims), provides healthcare and education, loves them in tangible ways, and then equips them to live on their own. 

 

I've cheered from the sidelines as I've watched my friend Kristen Welch, author of  We Are That Family, imagine this ministry following her blogging trip with Compassion International.  It's a beautiful, inspiring story of how one person with a vision can change the world.

 

She would humbly shrug her shoulders and remind me that any success is the Lord's not hers.  But let me tell you this, 12 mamas and their 12 babies are alive and thriving because of Kristen's (and many others) determination and perserverance, washed in a sea of tears and overcoming challenge that would defeat most of us.

 

{in}courage, DaySpring's online community for women is celebrating its fourth birthday by championing Mercy House and throwing our all behind Kristen and her tribe of warriors (her husband, Mauren, Mercy House's director, among others).

 

Four years ago I had the distinct privilege of publishing a piece on the first day {in}courage was launched (along with Holley Gerth and Nester).  (Woah! I just realized that means I've written 48 posts for incourage...not to mention a zillion for Bloom book club....but I digress.)  I had no idea what I was getting into but it's a "yes" that has blessed me personally a thousandfold, both for the challenge of sharing my faith and because of those I've met along the way (online and off).  

Today I'm inviting you to Kenya by boldly asking YOU to support Mercy House.  Between now and Christmas {in}courage is partnering with Kristen and her team to raise $74,000 for five specific projects. 

 

Would you please consider a LARGE gift (truly, any size gift :) ) for Phase 1, a van to transport the moms and babies?

It's very easy to give through Pure Charity, and I encourage you to please read more if you aren't yet convinced.

 

So often you can't be sure of where your contributions are going; but I assure you Kristen and her team are wise stewards of the monies that come in.  Nothing goes to waste and they need outside support. 

 

In addition to your financial support, there are other ways to partner with Mercy House Kenya.

• Pray for workers' (and the moms') safety, wisdom and vision for their future.
• Share this post and about our fundraiser on your social networks (Facebook Like, Facebook Share, Twitter, Pinterest, StumbleUpon--any and all!!).

 

Thank you in advance for sharing your words, influence and dollars for the benefit of others.  Is there any better use? 

 

 

 Keep track of our progress--looks like we're over halfway there!!

WAHOO!! Phase 1 is OVER-funded--

THANK YOU for your generous giving!

Please stay tuned for Phase 2!!!

 

 

 

If You Can't Be With The Ones You Love, Love The Ones You're With (Part 3)

iii.

I arrived in Chattanooga with my arms open wide.

Eager for adventure.

Expectant.

It's an odd thing how the Lord works in your life, though; it's rarely what you imagine it will look like.

When we had arrived in our previous home town, we had no family or friends, were married just over a year and excited about the possibilities.  

Our pages were unwritten and I couldn't wait to fill them in living color.  

I don't think our dreams were particularly big; they were simple, American dreams, the stuff of Happy Days set in the 80s and 90s.  Traditional.

Pre-internet, and for God's sake, pre-social media over-sharing.

No, make that over-comparing.  At least we didn't have that going against us.

The day after we moved into our townhouse, another young couple moved in below us.  I remember peeking out the window to spy on them.  The next week I baked brownies and took them downstairs to meet our neighbors, another young couple married with no kids.  

In time, they would become life friends, the kind connected by the heart where geograpy knows no bounds.  

We were off to a good start.

Over the next ten years our roots grew deep and strong.  I found a job quickly, then a year later a dream job found me.  I worked right until the day before giving birth to our first baby.  

Two sons would join our daughter over the next four years.  

We'd become church servers and church leaders, and eventually I even worked at our church.

Our circle of friends was large; with the exception of our dear neighbors, we met all of them at church.  

We worshipped together, retreated together, traveled together, double- and triple-dated together, had babies together (well, not together, but you know what I mean)--a whole lot of together.

Stage of life and common faith united us.  Kindred threads bound us tight.

After 10 years, my husband considered a job opportunity that would take us to Greenville, SC, closer to his familiy.  We were serious enough about it to drive around town and scout neighborhoods.

I remember feeling sick to my stomach.

There was no way I was moving to that place.  It felt foreign, strange, unfamiliar.  I gripped our hometown with white knuckles and iron fist.  It wasn't just me, my husband agreed at the time.

(Ironies abound in this:  

• 18 months ago we found ourselves living in Germany, a truly foreign, strange and unfamiliar place.
• today if you asked me where I would live if I could choose anywhere in the Southeast, my answer would be Greenville, SC

Hilarious.  Or not.)

Anyway, we returned home from that career-fishing trip sure about staying right where we were.  Life was good.  We were happy.  We had a great church and wonderful friends--why in the world would we want to mess with that? 

And then slowly and at times painfully, God loosened my grip on our precious little, South Carolina hometown.  Things changed at church setting into motion cracks in our perfect world.  Friends moved.  Friendships shifted or fractured.  Jobs were affected.  9-11 happened.  

The entire world was spinning out of control.

There were still good things and wonderful people in our lives, but they were getting harder to see.

In around three years time, I had gone from wild horses can't drag me away to get me the hell out of here!

When opportunity knocked on our door to move to Chattanooga, to say we were thrilled is understatement.  A great job in a beautiful town?  The only downsides were moving farther from family and having to start over at 40.  

What could possibly go wrong?

So, yes, I arrived in Chattanooga with my arms open wide...

*

*

*

The subsequent ten years would prove to be the hardest of my life.

 

to be continued....

 

If you're interested in following along, please take time to subscribe by email.

Part One

Part Two